Since Master Simon in Doms of Dark Haven delights in using toys, I thought I’d talk a little bit about one of my favorite types–vibrators.

Never used a sex toy before? No? Okay then, here’s a few tips. Everyone’s different. What sends your best friend into orgasmo-land might do nothing for you. So don’t buy the most expensive item in the catalogue–start cheap. You might want to try something that can be used in more than one way, like a toy you can insert, that also vibrates. And don’t let your imagination talk you into a huge dildo, especially if you haven’t been with a guy recently. You might want to start with something smaller than life-size. (You can always buy mongo-cock later)

A vibrator does have certain advantages over a man: You always know where the vibrator has been. It isn't going to leave you with another hungry mouth to feed. You're the only one who can charge its batteries. It doesn't always finish first. You don't need a court order to get rid of the thing. It always starts on the first pull. (Sorry, I couldn’t resist adding these in)

But seriously, a vibrator can be a wonderful toy to have, either to use alone or to spice up your sex life.

Before you make any buying decisions, think about how you want to use this magical toy. Is the vibrator just for you, or will you use it with your partner? Do you want it for mostly clitoral stimulation or vaginal penetration? Or both? Do you like a toy that looks like a cock or would you rather have interesting shapes?

Got a few ideas in mind? Then it’s time to start looking. And oh-my-God, there are still too many decisions to make.

Are you going to use it in the bathtub or bed–some toys are waterproof, some aren’t. (Electrocuting yourself in the tub–don’t do that)

Battery or electric: Battery vibrators come in various sizes and shapes from the size of a lipstick to massive are-you-related-to-King-Kong behemoths to strap-on types. You can also find remote controlled vibrators–something that a sadistic-minded partner might really enjoy, especially if you’re going out that night.

Do you want major intense vibrations? Perhaps choose an electric vibrator. They have stronger vibrations than battery powered, although some find them too intense. You can choose from the Hitachi wand type or coil type or the eroscillator that moves side-to-side rather than up and down. An electric vibrator will never go dead at the wrong moment, and they often come with various attachments.

If you don’t know if you like strong or light vibrations, either get one with a dial that lets you choose or go for the stronger ones. You can always put clothing or a towel between you and your toy to tone it down. If it’s too weak, you’re going to be a frustrated lady–and probably taking it out on your poor hapless Dom which will earn you a spanking to go with your bad mood. LOL!

If you don’t want a constant vibration, you can get ones that pulsate.

Shapes: There’s egg or bullet shaped vibes. They can be inserted, but most women use them for clitoral stimulation.

The G-spot vibrators are longer with a curved end to press onto the upper wall of the vagina. Some newer types are flexible, allowing you to find your own spot. Remember, some women will adore G-spot stimulation, some don’t see the difference. We’re all different.

For hands-free fun, you can find ‘butterfly’ vibrators that strap on and press a tiny vibrator to your clit. (Note, if you plan to use during lovemaking, check both that it’s small enough and the straps are designed to be out of the way of Himself. If he gets tangled in the straps, it’ll be you that suffers. He’ll probably take your toy away and tie you to the wall for a while.)

There are realistic penis-shaped vibrators, from slim to oh-my-god-are-you-insane sizes. They come in various smoothnesses, from nubby to smooth. How much friction do you like? Uh…if your Dom isn’t used to toys, I recommend not getting one that will make him feel like he’s competing with it. He’s liable to frown at you and then try putting it somewhere a lot more uncomfortable. L

Finally, there are multi-purpose vibrators like “rabbits” for the woman who wants it all. Dildo-shaped, they have a vibrating nub extending up to stimulate the clitoris, so you get both the fullness of penetration and clitoral stimulation. And, of course, they come in various speeds and settings.

Once you narrow it down–say, you want a rabbit vibrator–you’re still going to find far too many choices. To make an informed choice, you can find various online review sites just for sex toys. Some shopping sites provide you with customer reviews. (Reminds me of Amazon) If you check those out, you’ll get a better idea of how well-made the toy is, how loud, etc.

So your toy is here. Woohooo! Now what?

Check it over first; make sure it’s smooth with nothing sharp, that any wires are secure. Test all the buttons and speeds so you know what’s what. Check that you know how to turn it off. LOL! Wash it.

Then get down to business. Start on a low setting and play with it. Use it on various parts of your body and get a feel of how the range of vibrations feel. Work your way to the best spot (we all know where that is).

Most women find that one side of the clit, even one spot, is better…more sensitive and responsive…than another. Have a wonderful time locating all the best spots (feel free to share the information with a partner later) Experiment with the speeds, play with different pressures–you might like hard and fast or you might prefer a lighter touch. Vibrators come in different shapes, so try out the flatter parts, and then try the point. What areas work best? Above your clit? To one side? Against your labia? If it’s the dildo-type, then try it inside. Pushing upward toward your belly will give you G-spot stimulation.

Now that you’ve discovered all sorts of information about your body and had a few mind-blowing orgasms, does your partner wants to take a shot at beating your record? An inventive Dom can use a vibrator to reward his sub with some fun, or to get her so prepared that when he enters, she’s liable to climax right then…or to drive her crazy by stopping right before she comes. Just how evil-minded is your Dom?

Is there something that I can use with my boyfriend that he'll enjoy too?

If your boyfriend likes to see you getting off, any of these vibes will do. Some guys like to see their woman penetrated or like to penetrate them with a toy, it allows them to get that up close and personal view that they can't get when he is penetrating you himself. There is also a toy out there that both man and woman can get pleasure from simultaneously. The Diving Dolphin is a couple's intercourse toy that my boyfriend and I enjoy and have for years. It's a jelly cock ring with 2 bullet vibes attached to it. The cock ring acts as an erection enhancer and prolongs erection for the guy and the bullets, 1 on top and 1on bottom, deliver pleasant vibrations to the testicles and the clitoris. It's powered by a corded battery pack with two separate controls for each bullet vibe, so each partner can get the pleasurable amount of vibrations they desire.

Or do you want to try everything? Battery-powered vibrators offer fantastic portability and easy handling with a softer vibration, while electric vibrators give unparalleled power. Some men and women prefer the realism of an actual penis, while others would rather try out pleasingly unique shapes. Imagine first how you would use the vibrator, and then browse the selection to see what works for you.

~ Cherise

Okay, y’all, here’s the disclaimer that the big guys say must be here: The articles here are presented for general information only and are not meant as “how-to” guides. Use the information at your own risk. Bear in mind that nothing in this world is safe, especially when it comes to sex ;-). Please don’t try any new sexual practice, especially BDSM, without the guidance of an experienced practitioner. Neither Cherise Sinclair nor contributors will be responsible for any loss, harm, accidents, injuries, or death resulting from use of the information or actions inspired by this website. Whew.